When the subject first came up, Jip said she didn’t want to come with us to Ban Krud for the anniversary of her dad’s passing. But an hour before we were to head out, it struck her that if she went along, she wouldn’t be alone that night with a caregiver she is still learning to trust. Out of the blue she said, “I want to go too.”
At that point, a change in plans would have been possible but tricky. We’d have needed to find a van, waited half a day for her to finish her bathroom and shower routine, organized her food, and packed a really big bag of stuff.
I knew she wasn’t completely serious about wanting to take the trip. Yet I still felt terrible leaving her behind on a journey that was about family and her dad. In fact I felt a bit like her dad when I told her, “next time.”
When we returned to Bangkok, she was smiling and calm. I’m sure she had no regrets about skipping the long drive. Her mom returned with us for a short visit, which in my mind made up for Jip having missed out on the ceremony itself.
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